Chandler on spouse shaming

Never seek to shame your spouse in public (or in private for that matter).

This sin is as huge as it is common. Have you ever been at a table when this happened? Doesn’t it create a stifling spirit of awkwardness? Never publicly embarrass your mate. It’s obviously a handy way to humiliate her, to “put her in her place,” but it’s so damaging to the soul. The humiliation and the shame don’t dissipate easily, if ever. Public shaming also wins you no allies; most people in these settings tend to immediately sympathize with the humiliated person. So if you want to kill the mood of a social engagement, shame your spouse, and lose friends, go right ahead and embarrass your spouse. But if you want to do the right thing, hold your tongue. The desire to criticize and knock your spouse down to size in the presence of others comes from hell.

From

The Mingling of Souls